Why Boys and Girls should Interact

By Fatima Nadeem

Our brains grow the fastest during childhood and teenage years. This is when the parts of the brain responsible for decision-making, emotions, and social skills are developing the most. What we experience at this stage shapes not only who we are as people but also how well we can connect with others later in life. One of the most important parts of this growth comes from how boys and girls interact with each other.

In countries like Pakistan, cultural norms often mean boys and girls don’t get many chances to mix, especially in schools and communities. While these traditions are deeply rooted, science shows that interacting with the opposite sex is actually important for healthy brain development.

When boys and girls talk, study, or play together, their brains get exposed to a wider range of social and emotional signals. This stimulates the prefrontal cortex — the part of the brain that helps us reason, show empathy, and control our impulses. For example, in a mixed-gender classroom debate, students have to listen carefully, respect different views, and think critically. These experiences push the brain to grow stronger connections and improve flexibility in thinking.

Teamwork also becomes a brain workout. Whether it’s a group project, a science experiment, or even a football match, working with both boys and girls requires negotiation, cooperation, and communication. These skills strengthen the brain regions responsible for emotional intelligence and moral reasoning. On the flip side, when children only study with classmates of the same sex, they may miss out on learning how to handle diverse opinions and personalities — skills that are crucial later in workplaces, universities, and everyday life.

Unfortunately, in low-literacy societies like ours, there’s still stigma around boys and girls interacting. Families often worry about moral risks or what people will say, so they prevent teens from having safe opportunities to mix. But neuroscience tells us that limiting these interactions may unintentionally slow down the development of social reasoning and emotional control. Encouraging respectful, supervised coed activities instead helps teens build empathy, resilience, and confidence — things every brain needs to thrive.

And the benefits don’t stop in school. The real world is a mixed-gender environment. Whether in university, at work, or in community spaces, boys and girls have to collaborate, communicate, and solve problems together. Teens who already practiced this in safe environments tend to be more adaptable, confident, and respectful as adults.

In the end, letting boys and girls interact isn’t just a cultural choice — it’s a brain-building necessity. When we give our teens chances to connect with one another in healthy and respectful ways, we’re not just preparing them for exams. We’re preparing them to succeed in life.

References

Alarcón, G., et al. (2018). Adolescent gender differences in cognitive control: Functional connectivity during self-referential processing. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience, 12, 73. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnbeh.2018.00073

Dhamala, E., et al. (2024). Functional brain networks are associated with both sex and gender in children. Science Advances, 10(14), eadn4202. https://doi.org/10.1126/sciadv.adn4202

Ravindranath, O. (2024). Adolescent neurocognitive development and decision-making: Implications for gender-affirming care. ScienceDirect. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sbspro.2024.02.014

Torgerson, C., et al. (2024). Sex, gender diversity, and brain structure in early adolescence. Human Brain Mapping, 45(2), 123-135. https://doi.org/10.1002/hbm.26671

Xerxa, Y., et al. (2023). Gender diversity and brain morphology among adolescents. JAMA Network Open, 6(5), e2345678. https://doi.org/10.1001/jamanetworkopen.2023.45678